Broken heart, still mending two years later?

I have to say this one is new to me, very very new.

I never have been a very sentimental person, but as a lot of stories start, there was this one girl, the one who got away.

It has been about 18 months now, over a year and a half, one relationship and many crushes since her, but why do I still suddenly miss her?

This is one question I cannot for the life of me answer. I managed to go almost a year with out thinking of her, or in this way at least. Untill something just went wrong or clicked in my head, and now for about a week now I havent stopped thinking about her, what we had, and what could have been.

She was a gorgeous lovely girl, with shoulder length blonde hair, lovely brown eyes, and a skinny petite body to die for, not forgetting the killer smile....

We broke up after a while of arguing, I knew I didn't want to lose her, I felt love for her like no one before, or at the time I thought I did, but now, I begin to think it must have been, she must have been the one, right? or why else would I be thinking about her so long after we broke up and in the same way?

I thought it was just going to take time at first, but to begin, I let a month pass, and thought I would get over her soon, then 2, then 3 and before I knew it, I had still been wanting to hear back from her after 6 months.

I finally pulled myself together and got back on track, and started seeing some one else seriously, and BAMM, I get hit with an email from her, saying she still feels the same, and regrets ever breaking up, but I was just starting a new life, new relationship, and I wanted to try and get this one to the same point as the last. I told the new girl about her, and she wasnt too sure, so to keep her happy, I cut off all ties with the ex I had been pining for and still in love with.

For a year I kept seeing the new girl, and kept trying to make it work and tried so hard to have the same feelings for my ex, but they never came, and we finally split. No remorse, no regrets and no need to worry about her, or think about her. Yet all of a sudden all feelings i had for my ex have came rushing back, and just as strong and intense as ever before, but why? It feels like I have gone back a million steps, to where I was over a year ago, but should I put everything on the line and contact her, should I try to find and work out the problems we had, and do what I would have by now, and move the 100 miles across the country to be with her, just as I was about to do before we split. Or do I just leave it, and try to move on, no matter how hard it is?



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